In our previous post which is practically the first part of our definitive guide on how to overcome a broken heart – fast, we answered some commonly asked questions about heartbreak.
Now for the second part, we’re going to focus on the practical steps and various self-help methods that can be followed to get over a heartbreak.
How to Overcome a Heartbreak Fast – A Recap
Breakups are terrible. And if you’ve read the previous post you’d know I recently went through a breakup myself – and I can tell you personally, it is one of the darkest, most terrible things that can happen to a human.
Since this is an actual guide to overcoming heartbreak fast, I will begin by saying of course not ALL breakups are terrible, and there are some amiable kinds, and some borne of mutual understanding, that are pretty easy to move on from.
These, though, are not what we’re going to be dealing with here today.
Self Help Methods to get Over a Heartbreak – Today’s Agenda
Today I’m going to be dealing with the hard kind of breakups here; the breakup where your partner got “tired” or where you got cheated on or where one or both parties really weren’t willing to let go just yet but situations and circumstances caused a separation.
These are the rough, difficult ones.
The dark painful ones where you’re in so much pain and there is nothing to look up to in the entire world, only darkness.
The kind that pushes you deep into deep depression where everything looks just fucking bleak.
Depending on how much you love the person and how much you invested in the relationship, you might even start to have some really dark and unhealthy thoughts after one of these rough breeds of heartbreaks.
Thankfully, though, we are humans and we tend to move on. With time we heal and forget. Time is a healer, remember, even when you don’t want it.
So rest assured, time will do a lot of work for you, but you also have to put in the effort, and these are just some of the things you have to do to overcome your heartbreak fast.
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Self Help Methods to get Over a Heartbreak- Let it Out
Sometimes we tend to feel weak when we show emotions, because that is what society deems it as: weakness.
But the truth is we have the right to be vulnerable at times. Because we go through some terrible stuff that the world doesn’t know about, and frankly that they don’t care about. So why should we care about what they think of us when we choose to let it out?
What I’m trying to say is, there’s nothing wrong with you showing your pain. This is in fact the very first self-help method to get over a heartbreak. You want to cry? Then frigging cry. You wanna scream? Then scream.
You want to punch a puching bag then by all means punch a punching bag – just for God’s sake don’t punch a wall or something hard is all.
How to Overcome a Heartbreak Fast – Distance
The first of our practical self help methods to overcome a heartbreak fast is what we call: the sphere method.
Just imagine your whole life is a sphere you’re caught in, and you get to decide who gets into this sphere, for how long, how deep, and also of course, who doesn’t.
Now you’re not the only one who gets to choose, because some things might sneak in without your permission, but in the end you have the final say.
Also the sphere is both physical – an imaginary line encompassing your body -and psychological – an imaginary line encompassing your mind.
The Art of Distancing – Acceptance
I should start by saying distancing is not a very easy thing to do. You will feel as though you have to be with that person, especially if it’s somebody with whom you’ve made a lot of memories.
You would not want to accept the fact that it’s over. What you’ve invested a tangible part of your life in. You will want to hold on and convince yourself that you can work it out, and I can assure you that there is only pain to be gotten from this.
You have to come to terms with the fact that there is nothing they can do for you anymore, and that the only to do is move on and give yourselves distance.
They slipped into the sphere, they got in deep, they spend a good time, but now all that is over. It’s time to kick them out of the sphere, both physical and psychological.
And since they’re both highly inter-connected, you have to start from the physical first.
Now in your journey to achieve distance, both physcially and psychologically, you will experience the urge to come back every single moment, but there is no healing this way.
You have to hold your resolve. Remember it is your sphere. Errants can kick in and cause a few ruckus, but in the end you – you! – and only you, have the final say.
Among the things that can help is distractions.
Self Help Methods to get Over a Heartbreak – Distractions
Every single little thing will remind you of them, but when you’re distracted; when you find something to do that will take over your time, and most importantly tale over their time, you find out that you start to miss them less – although it might not seem that way at first.
The mind, for every second that it is not occupied with something, will always find a way to go back to that person, because of the memories shared.
The more you engage in these distractions, however, the more you find yourself distancing memories, phyically and psychologically, and as time goes on, healing.
How to Overcome a Heartbreak Fast – Creativity
You know what they say, the most perfect distractions are the creative ones. This is mainly because they serve not just one but multiple functions.
First they help you to take your mind off that thing that is hurting you and causing you great pain, and also by dedicating your time and putting it to much better use in the form of creating something beautiful, cathartic, and therapeutic, not just for you but maybe even for others
I mean there’s a a reason we all love a good Adele or a good Sam Smith, right? And it is because they’ve both found ways to channel their hurt and put it into something positive and meaningful.
So get up, sit down, write, draw, paint, sing. Do that thing you’re good at or trying to become better at. Channel your hurt into it and you’ll be surprised how so beautiful a thing can come off so much pain.
Self Help Methods to get Over a Heartbreak – A Breath of fresh Air
Again, not just physically, but psychologically, too.
Physically you cannot overestimate the advantage of going outside and seeing that sunlight or that butterfly or just people walking around; just breathing in that fresh air is so pivotal to your healing and its impact is pretty much unquantifiable.
Because trust me after a break up your normal reaction is to stay hold up somewhere and just get yourself stuck in the past thinking and over-thinking.
Stepping out, however, is going to serve as a means for you to get away from yourself.
Now psychologically – and this is even more important – you have to mentally prepare yourself to step into a new space.
You have to understand now that that part of your life is over, it’s in the past. This is your opportunity for a breath of fresh air. You have to constantly drum that into your mind – and with this, I can assure you, you’re well on your way to overcoming any form of heartbreak.
As mentioned ealier, one really important thing you must always understand while you take the steps to overcome your broken heart is that THINGS GET BETTER WITH TIME.
All you gotta do is get through it.
There will be times you feel as though there is no hope for the future. You feel that the pain will never leave you, but trust me, it’s just the hurt clouding your senses.
With time you will get clarity; the world will get beautiful again, and things won’t seem as bad as they once did – and, when that time comes, I swear, it’s almost like a miracle.
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